8.10.2012

Settling quietly.




Some things you read just hit you over the head with a hammer. This reading did just that. I have been doing this, unintentionally. These last four months have been a whirlwind...the move to Hawaii, Noel's Change of Command, birthdays, committments, obligations, choosing schools, choosing a church, surgeries, house hunting, waiting & waiting & waiting  to move in, then making it our home. I can FINALLY say we're settled. Well, minus the pictures on the walls..that's the last thing. What I consider the icing on the cake. The updates here have been close to nil, but very often on Instagram and here, since shotty internet connections and my newfound love with an Iphone 4s.

This move broke me down emotionally. I can honestly say that I struggled showing gratitude for what we asked for and feeling heartbroken for the things that I left behind. Yes, I realize I'm in Hawaii...paradise & all and then there was Italy. I sense the non-sympathetic glares from your screen. I deserve them!!! Bring them on!!! I know!!! I feel ungrateful at times but returning to my hometown, living in my own space,  surrounded by the people that know me best in the world was as close to heaven as I can imagine. Honestly, Florida and Hawaii are very similar, at least, in my mind...ha ha! 

The first time I left home, my family and hometown friends, fifteen years ago, it was exciting.  I couldn't wait to start my life with Noel, my military man. I rarely looked back. The same thing happened when we received orders to Italy. However, now, it's all I do...look back. I miss my version of Peyton Place and those crazy characters from home...wretched nostalgia. It's hurt my creativity. I'm in a bit of slump but it'll come back...it always does. 

In the meantime, I've been quiet. My hands have been busy creating a home. 

16 comments:

  1. I know! I know! I know! And every time we have to start over, it stings. Make your home in HI, and love it while you're there. You will look back in fondness; you know that. :)

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  2. I would say you've been through quite a bit! Moving your life, as well as an entire family, drains a person. Your creative self will return with a newness of spirit. This I am sure of. :)

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    1. Thank you. I've been better at shelving and journaling my ideas until I can get to them. That has helped loads.

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  3. creating a home is what you are to do...and once that is set your creativity will be there...i am sure of it...

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    1. It takes some creativity to make a home.

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  4. you never lost it...it is all there and it is back...thank you

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  5. Quite an adjustment you've had to make. Give yourself some time.
    And this photo is just beautiful, Liza!

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    1. Thanks. I certainly am getting better at giving myself a little slack. Doing a little at a time.

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  6. I'm with you. We're here in Montana with family right now while hubby is out to sea-- not the same as living here WITH hubby for years, but still we are at 'home' and with loved ones-- and the longer I am here the more scared I feel about our return to Florida, a place that, though beautiful and amazing, just isn't 'home'. Not sure how I feel about continuing this path of Navy moving. Seems like you've enjoyed it... but there was something that changed for you when you were 'home'? What do you think this means for you now, and your choices for the future?

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  7. I am in awe of you and others that are able to pick up their lives and move ...anywhere. I live in my Grandparents home which is four houses from the house I grew up in. We've talked for years about moving south ( same state ) and haven't been able to get up the nerve to do it. But, I totally understand what you mean. My two oldest that live in Arizona and Missouri are both miserable being away from home and family, my son even more than my daughter. I wonder if you would feel less homesick if Hawaii were not an island.
    I'll keep you in my prayers :-)

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    1. That is amazing to me. Having family roots so deeply planted gives a person a sense of place...belonging. Thank you for thinking of me and keeping us in your prayers. God knows we need them.

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  8. Such a great quote to go with that photo. It reminds me a bit of myself, the introvert that I tend to be. Lovely.

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  9. Hi Liza, I clicked through to your blog from mine and I've gotta say that I love it. I can totally relate to moving, feeling overwhelmed and getting into a slump but just like you, you know that it always feels right and good again in the end. You're amazing for doing it with kids and with a partner who may often be away - super woman!

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    1. Thanks Ana Maria. I usually start getting lost in traveling our just getting to know the place. The traveling and experiencing new places is the best part. Good luck with your travels. Can't wait to see where your adventures lead you.

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Thank you.